The jacket wasn't leather

"SHELL FACE: 100% POLYURETHANE"

A good leather jacket is made of durable, soft material, is black, and has a good cut. Not lots of pieces patched together. And, uh, it's made of LEATHER! Right?

Years ago, my wife bought me a black leather jacket from Wilsons Leather for my birthday. It was glorious and drew compliments. Felt so soft. I think it was made of sheepskin, or something. I wore it out, and it fell apart. Alas, I was without a leather jacket.

Some time later, a friend and I tried on cosmically expensive Coach jackets. If Coach made clothes for taller people, I might have gotten a loan so that I could match my Coach messenger bag.

Years later still, I was walking through Macy's department store on Black Friday and saw an $80 black leather jacket from Calvin Klein. It looked amazing, and I bought it instantly. In the years since, when people compliment me on it, I sometimes tell them about the deal.

This one has lasted much longer than that first one. And it has even fewer seams than the first. I'm surprised at how well it has held up. It must be made of rhino skin, or something.

Well, last week, I was explaining to my six-year-old daughter about my prized jacket and showed her the tag saying what it was made of.

Imagine my surprise: It isn't leather. It's polyurethane.

Artificial. Fake. Inauthentic.

A crisis! I've been living a lie! Duped!

But... I still love it. Maybe not as much. But it's what I can afford right now—heaven knows these tokens and GPUs don't come cheap. It looks amazing. It does a great job. And while I might not feel the full and complete pride I felt before when wearing this jacket, I'm still glad to have it, and it was still a great deal.

I need to manage the tension between my desire for authenticity and actually satisfying my needs with the resources available to me.

Beyond the material scarcity that most of us live with, human connections are another precious resource. My life's meaning is largely defined in the context of my family and friends. The authenticity of thoughtful human feedback, the satisfaction and comfort of really connecting with someone, and having them connect with you, are priceless.

The most painful parts of my life relate to the fragility and imperfection of my human relationships—which, of course, relates to my own haunting imperfections! My daughter is growing up, and someday, I won't be around for her anymore. And I don't always say the right things, even when I am with her.

I create artificial people so that humans can have the benefit of an assistant, a friend, a strategist, a planner, and more. I know that it won't be as good as the real thing. But it will be there for those who might not have had the support they need in their lives. And in some important ways, like my pleather jacket's availability and durability, it might even be better.